We recognise masculine energy as that intense drive to blaze through all odds and succeed – which is a good thing. But many women often miss the subtle ways their masculine energy causes issues in their relationships with men.
Women are amazing creatures. Honestly, I’m often amazed by how we just know how to run things no matter the storm. We multi task and accomplish amazing things and so much of what a woman does is ‘unseen’ or ‘unacknowledged’.
Everyone has both masculine and feminine energy within them. That which is directional, goal orientated and strong, and that which is process orientated, open and soft. However how much focus and attention we give to each of these is different for each person. There is so so much to discuss on this subject and many women have lost touch with their innate feminine power – often because society has taught them that it is not valuable enough. They must have an outward show of masculine achievement to be deemed as successful or worthwhile.
Channelling your masculine energy is crucial in achieving great things. Women often use this in energy in their careers and businesses, even in raising a brood of children; but when there is no balance between the masculine energy and female energy, it leads to problems.
Exhaustion sets in, as they end up being the one who does it all, for everyone. They start to attract the wrong type of guys, the type who wants to sit on his ass while you do all the work.
Emasculation often rears its ugly head, and the masculine energy starts to repel eligible men as it becomes out of balance in the relationship.
These 7 points will open your mind to how your out of balance energy is hurting your love life.
MORE FOCUSED ON OUTCOME THAN PROCESS
Many women start jumping to conclusions when they barely know the man they are dating. They find a guy they like and start day dreaming from day 1 about how the relationship will go. We know that men and women operate differently, to pretend this isn’t so only creates problems for you. Mentally, they often don’t reason the same and often, priorities are different. When you are focused on where you want to go and forget about the journey to get there – your date feels like an end to a means, and no one likes to feel controlled.
WHEN YOU INITIATE THE TALK
The fastest way to chase away a cutie you just met is to ask him The Question, “Where’s this going?” . If this comes too soon he will look like a rabbit in the headlights, or worse just lie to make you happy. Give it time, and allow things to unfold naturally. Do you know his plans, dreams, goals and fears? Let him take the lead.
BEING PERFORMATIVE IN BED
Bet you didn’t see this one coming. I know that sexual validation can be very exciting, enticing but it can keep you trapped in an illusion. Mind-blowing sex has never been the cement to the foundation of a lasting relationship – or you would still be cuddled up with THAT guy from THAT time that blew your mind. Don’t get me wrong, sex is crucial but using sex as a tool to getting a committed relationship is not a good idea, because it does not work. Sex is one thing but not the only thing. Let a great guy see you as an embodiment of all things amazing, not just bedroom fun.
So many ladies think chivalry is dead. But if your main response to assistance is “I don’t need you to do that. I could do that myself” it’s no wonder you end up doing everything by yourself.
You may pride yourself on ‘not needing a man’ – so then it’s no wonder you don’t one really, is it?
You are afraid of your power being taken away – that’s the root here – and so you reject a man treating you like a lady. You are so invested in being independent that you’ve forgotten that just because you CAN do it all, doesn’t mean you HAVE to do it all.
When genuine acts to show gentlemanship are taken with a pinch of salt, chivalry dies, and maybe you killed it? A guy wants to please you, wants to make you happy but he needs to know-how. And that means you need to show him and it means that you need to allow him to help you. A lot of ladies I work with are genuinely great women and don’t even realise how they emasculate men and cause them to take a step back. Of course there are others who know exactly what they’re doing – and it’s they who are the toxic ones.
YOU TRY AND FIX MEN
Men aren’t a broken toy you can fix. Feeling needed is wonderful and women, naturally tune towards this. Women often feel the need to help a man with his baggage, but you have to realise that you also have yours and should never prioritise his over yours.
You are not a rehab for broken men.
Men bond with a woman that they can provide for. Please read that again.
And even if he’s not making more money than you, he absolutely should be paying for things sometimes.
Get a DIY project, not a DIY man.
Gratitude is like a gift that keeps on giving. When you show your man appreciation towards gestures or deeds such as taking out the trash it only encourages him to do much more. You don’t always have to be the puppeteer pulling the strings, directing how everything should be. If he offers to help, let him. And the more you do, that the more it will come.
TRYING TO GET IN HIS HEAD
It’s time to stop constantly analysing your man. When you’re trying to analyse what he’s doing, why he’s doing it, you’re trying to work him out – you are in his head and out of your body. Meaning, out of your feminine feeling place, and up in your head – it can create anxiety in you and your power and energy start to leak away. Have you ever noticed that? You start to doubt yourself, even criticise yourself, and take up time with made up stories in your head. Even though you may not say anything – this energy can be felt and is not alluring.
Masculine energy is awesome and brings forth a fresh breath of life but it shouldn’t topple your feminine energy. It’s breathtaking for any man to have a woman who has everything on lock, someone that wants you but doesn’t need you, so try to increase your feminine energy in relationship so that you are more in balance.
I have an amazing and popular masterclass on this that you can access here.