So many people are dealing with anxiety, so much of the time. A lot of people reach out to me for one to one work when they’ve finally had enough of it. The cause of the anxiety is different from one person to the next, as is the expression of it. For some people it looks like no sleep, and a constant knot in the stomach, for others they feel anxious around others, insecure and overwhelmed by fear. There is no one size fits all quick fix, but I will give you my no bullsh*t tips to dealing with anxiety.
You don’t want to hear this, but because I want you to be happy I’m willing for you not to like me for a bit.
You probably have some sh*t to deal with, that you ain’t been dealing with.
Hmm yah, maybe you do have a chemical imbalance; but for most of you, you have some sh*t to deal with that you’ve been avoiding and that’s why the anxiety keeps popping up. It’s a signal from your body that something wants healing; wants to be witnessed, wants to be heard, wants to be loved, wants to be put back together.
Trust me, I know what a panic attack feels like. It feels like you’re going to die, and someone is cutting off your air supply. It feels like you’re leaving your body. It feels like someone has their invisible hands wrapped around your throat. Maybe it comes up different for you.
You may, or may not know what that is, the thing that needs healing, but if you are tired of your insides feeling like a washing machine on high spin, put on your big girl panties and let’s get down to business, because you don’t have to live like this.
It takes courage, it takes support, but I believe in you. We’re supposed to learn from our past, not drag the crap sack of it around with us forever.
Because all humans are different, and so are the causes of anxiety, and so is it’s expression, you have to find what works for you. There is no one size fits all cure. Even meds don’t work for some people, or the side effects are so awful they can’t stand them.
Just trying to treat the anxiety symptoms without trying to heal the underlying cause is as useful as a chocolate teapot in the long term, though it will probably provide some short term relief. Right now, we’re talking about the long haul, k.
Sometimes, after a period of stress, your adrenals keep pumping out cortisol & adrenaline, the stress & fight or flight chemicals, even though the ‘threat’ (stressful time) is over. Your hormones get out of whack, and your brain may start to recognise and respond to a situation as stressful even when it isn’t really. Meaning, you have a lower tolerance for stressful situations and feel stressed easier than you used to. Neurons start firing, hormones start flowing, sweat starts pumping, and you’re only trying to go to the corner shop. FFS.
Many people are unaware of what the root cause may be, but upon further inspection find something lurking that needs to be given the boot.
Your brain may trigger a stress response, to things that you are unaware of and rationally don’t think should cause you anxiety, yet they do. (E.g. a certain loud noise may begin to trigger anxiety, because your brain has linked it to a potential threat) If you’ve experienced a traumatic event of any kind, it can change your body’s ability to deal with stress completely, and this is what we see with PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder).
This is a mahoosive topic; and there’s more on contributing factors here , so let me get to the tips.
Also known as tapping, is used successfully by war veterans to help them manage their PTSD. If it works for them it can work for you. It works by utilising the meridian system, a network of energy highways in your body, and clearing blocks and tension that is stopping the natural flow of energy in your body.
I don’t care if it works by unicorn highways, all I know is this sh*t works.
You have to keep practicing to feel confident and know what to say, but the more you do the easier it will get and it’s great on the spot relief that puts you back in control. Book a session with me HERE so I can show you how tailor it to your needs. Or there’s loads of different you tube videos, or find another practitioner you like.
What you find as you go through this technique is you will start to plug in to and realise the emotions and events that are beneath the anxiety symptom and you can start to shift that.
If you know you’ve experienced a difficult time, either recently or on the past that could have lead to your anxiety, strongly consider getting good therapy. It can take a couple of goes to click with a therapist you like and feel comfortable with, but when you do it’s gold. Transactional Analysis is good for unpicking complicated relationships, traumas and behaviours. CBT could help you with irrational thoughts or social anxiety (but it may take more than this to heal your heart and distrust due to your dad leaving). Person centred therapy can help you through a life transition. Find someone who specialises in what you need to deal with.
Very often, you will notice that over time your anxiety reduces, because you have dealt with it at the root. You may however, still have some bodily responses that happen and cause anxiety. EMDR works neurobiologically and can help to reduce distress.
There’s many different possibilities, find one that resonates with you and stick to it for a good old while. The right therapist and the right approach are key. I’ve had great ones, I’ve had not great ones. For me, I needed someone who knew their sh*t. I wasn’t wasting my money with someone who was just going to reflect back to me what I’d said, I can do that with my friends. I needed someone who could help me unpick what the hell was going on, understand my feelings, fears and emotions and overcome them. May the AHA moments commence!!
This is the counselling directory in the UK There are similar websites for other countries.
Many studies show meditation reduces stress and anxiety. Deepak Chopra says it helps so it must be true.
But where to get started? When your mind won’t shut up, it’s a bit hard to sit still and try to relax so here’s what I suggest.
- Use a mantra – the simple ‘AUM’ /om is very calming. ‘Nam myoho range kyo’ is a buddhist mantra, which amongst other meanings is a dedication to your buddha nature, happiness and not being overcome by struggle! Hurrah!
It’s helps your mind focus on something, and the sound waves are very calming. You can do it aloud or silently. Start with 10 minutes.
2. Mindfulness is a technique many people love, and you can practice throughout the day, calling your energy and attention back to the present moment, taking your mind off fear and worry.
3. Another way is to put on brainwave entrainment music for relaxation. Have it on while you work, or go for a walk around the park with your headphones in, turn your phone off and just chill for a while, it will help your body and mind to relax. There’s lots of options on you tube, pick what you like best. I also have Wayne Dyer’s Moses Code meditation
Meditation actually helps to rewire neural pathways in the brain, which means that over time you may be less anxious, and it’s totally freeeeeeeeeee. You can get a free 10 minute anti stress meditation on my website www.jaydiamond.net
Dr Sachin Patel published a study in the journal Neuron about the effect of smoking cannabis on anxiety. There have been other such studies with mixed outcomes.
It’s said smoking marijuana can reduce anxiety because of the effect of its cannabinoids on the cannabinoid receptors in the brain, which makes up for the reduction in the production of natural endocannabinoids. Basically, chemicals are released and you feel more relaxed and less stressed.
However, chronic use of the drug can, paradoxically, increase anxiety as the drug reduces the efficiency of the brains’ cannabinoid receptors.
“Therefore, this can trigger a vicious cycle – that can leave people addicted to the drug” (because they believe or feel temporary relief, but their natural resources dwindle with overuse)
Read more here
It’s also been linked to schizophrenia. Read study here
Why am I saying this? Again because one brain doesn’t always behave like the other, your mate may feel amazing and chilled when they smoke but you may get paranoid and panicky. It is what it is. Everything ain’t for everybody, if it doesn’t agree with you, no need to push it. Find something else that does.
My 2 pence? I think it’s a massively abused sacred medicine in our culture. It can be a powerful bridge to a beautiful mind expansion and heart opening; or you can get consumed by it and need it everyday. Choice is yours. If you’re using it as a crutch, chances are it’s not healing your anxiety, it’s just masking it.
Reduces stress in the short term, helps you bury alive how you really feel when you start to depend on it to feel better / chill out / just relax / feel normal. Don’t let that be you, babe. Too much red wine gives you dragon breath anyway. Also, some hangovers can make you really anxious! That darn tequila!
This goes back to treating the underlying cause of anxiety, and this is one sure powerful way to do it. Working without words (or not that many anyway), plugging in to Divine energy source is a way to scan the body for emotional blockages, and get the eco system of your body flowing in harmony again. You may have stored fear, anger or insecurity that you have been repressing that shows itself as anxiety every now and then; like a cork that pops afloat in a tank of water. You can keep pushing down the cork, but it will always pop back up, unless you remove it. Energy healing helps these underlying emotions and blocks surface and pass through the body to be released once and for all. Hurrah! Goodbye!
Because these are no bulls*t tips I will be very straight with you. Sometimes it’s very relaxing, sometimes it’s challenging. Sometimes the only way out of it, is through it. That doesn’t mean reliving an awful experience, but tears may come, insecurity might come. I feel energy healing gets that crap up and out quick time, removing conditioned behaviour, beliefs ad emotions.
How long it takes for you depends on what chu got goin’ on. I have never had someone come to a session with me and say, well that was useless. They always get something out of it. Sometimes there are past lives that need some work, or a past traumatic labour, or a disappointment on meeting a birth family… there are many many human experiences that can cause us to crunch up inside and carry a quiet fear or anxiety. Even if we don’t think about it much these days.
I’m a Reiki Master, and I usually use Vortex Healing ™, or The Healing Codes with my clients. Vortex Healing ™ is very palpable, you can really feel deep stillness in your body as it’s working; with The Healing Codes, it often gives you insight into seeing where the stress response first began so you can start to shift it.
For example, one lady I worked with saw her back pain manifested when she was angry with feeling isolated looking after her son.
Best to lay off it, or cut right down. It can jar your system and make you jittery, setting off the old anxiety. Take note to see if there’s a correlation between when you have your coffee and when your anxiety starts.
This sounds ridiculously basic, but you’d be surprised how many people completely ignore the stresses they deal with every day, keep doing the same things, and wonder why they are anxious.
Your boss is making your life a misery – is it really worth it? Get another job. You are not your job.
Your partner makes you feel like sh*t – leave, get a dog, cry, go on holiday and realise how much better you feel now you’re out of there
Your family are manipulative and drama crazy – keep your ass away from the crazy makers, and stop trying to fix them, spend more time with people who make you feel good
Write down the anxiety triggers in your life, and find ways to manage them, you will thank yourself for your efforts. Your future self is counting on it.
I think that will do for now. What do you find works for you?
Sending you oodles of (calming) squishy hugs. I am proper cheering you on. You deserve to feel good.
And those, my love, are my 8 no bulls*t tips for anxiety.